"What's the Worst that Could Happen?"
  by: alynn17

I guess I've never been so confused in my life. One minute I was standing in the hall talking to my principal about yet another volunteer activity I would give time to. The next, two strange men were calmly informing me they were going to lift me on a stretcher. I couldn't remember anything. The hospital was terrifying. My parents, step-parents, grandparents, aunt, and principal all looked like they were ready to cry. Finally I went home - the diagnosis: dehydration. Drink more water, eat more salt.

I carried a water bottle everywhere. But it became pretty clear that the doctors were wrong only two weeks later. Again, the same scene. One minute I was talking to friends. The next I was on another exciting ride to the hospital. Lucky me. This time the doctors got it right- I wasn't dehydrated, I was epileptic.

I guess the moment they said that word will always be something I consider one of the defining moments of my life. There were so many questions, especially, "why me?" They took away my license. They gave me a list of rules to follow; things like "avoid heights over 6 feet." They put me on medicine. They made me wear a bracelet I dubbed my "dog tag", saying that I had this disease. And my mom decided to start treating me like I was five again. Everything changed in such a very short time. Yet everything stayed the very same.

Yes, I have epilepsy. Yes, I have had more seizures since then. Yes, my life has changed a lot. But sometimes change is a good thing. I wish change had come in a different way; change that didn't affect my ability to drive or cause me to be dependent on medicine. This experience has made me think about how lucky I am, how lucky I have always been. I have family to worry and care about me. I have friends and a wonderful boyfriend that bend over backward to help and support me. I am determined to make this as good of a thing as possible; I want to be a neurologist now. I won't let this disease define who I am.

I no longer ask, why me? Now I try to ask instead, what's the worst that can happen? So my friends will have to drive me around for awhile. It's not the end of the world or anything.